The British papers were full of royal stories this weekend. Some of the coverage was critical, but having read through multiple articles and columns in the Mail, Telegraph and Times, it looks like the royal reporters are dutifully circling the wagons under the belief that they can still somehow control the narrative. They don’t realize that the barn door was left open and the horses bolted long ago. Roya Nikkhah at the Sunday Times had the biggest exclusive, straight from Kensington Palace. When I say “straight from Kensington Palace,” I mean that I’m surprised she didn’t just publish the palace emails and WhatsApp messages directly instead of trying to hide the palace’s manipulations behind “sources.” You can read an archived version of Roya’s big, fancy exclusive here. Some highlights:
The Waleses will release a new photo for Louis’s birthday: Despite the global furore over Kate’s attempts to tidy up the picture, she and her husband, Prince William, are still expected to uphold the annual tradition of releasing a new photograph marking their children’s birthdays. Prince Louis turns six on April 23. “They appreciate the public’s love and affection for their children and know there is a public appetite to see them on their birthdays,” an aide said. Sources close to the couple say no “firm decision” has been taken yet on whether Kate will point the camera or leave it to a professional photographer.
The Frankenphoto fiasco fallout: A source close to Kate says she wanted to “bring a bit of joy” with what was intended as a reassuring image to thank the public for their support during her recovery from abdominal surgery in January. But the subsequent fallout and hysteria, screeches of a “royal crisis” and demands for “more transparency”, together with wild and unfounded conspiracy theories on social media about Kate’s health and the state of her marriage due to the “missing wedding ring”, has shaken them. A friend insists there was nothing sinister in Kate’s editing, just a desire to project the polished image that the public has come to expect from the couple: “It’s a photo that she knew everyone would pore over so she pored over it herself — she likes trying to make the family look the best they can.”
Devastated Kate: Kate was “devastated” by the furore, prompted by several picture agencies on Sunday night issuing “kill notices” for the image over “manipulation” that did not meet their standards. She moved decisively on Monday morning to “own it” with a rare personal apology on social media, to try to explain what happened. A friend and adviser to the couple said: “If you want to call out the mistake, it was Kate not telling her team that she’d done it [edited the photo]. But she came out and said sorry. The photo was a misstep, even with something as innocent as that you should disclose altering it. But in the history of image-cropping and photo-altering to tell a story, a lot of the reaction from picture agencies was hypocritical.”
When Kate will actually return to work: By [after Easter], they meant the end of their children’s school holidays, not the Easter weekend. They return to Lambrook School, near Ascot, on April 17, and Kate is still expected to resume public duties from then, though there are no signals yet as to when or where her first engagement will be. William will also take time away from public duties during their children’s Easter holiday.
William pulling out of his godfather’s memorial: The tide turned when William pulled out of a memorial service in Windsor at short notice last month for his godfather, King Constantine of Greece, citing a “personal matter”. The friend, who knows why William cancelled, said: “He had no choice but to pull out but the reaction was disappointing. That blew the lid off everything with people’s impatience to know what was going on. He’s not in ‘blaming the media’ mode. He’s just really upset that his wife is having to go through all of this with her recovery, and then having to think about making statements about a family photo.”
Kate will disclose her medical situation on her terms: A royal source said: “They are at their most open when out interacting with members of the public and I can see a world in which the princess might discuss her recovery out on engagements. If she was going to do it, that’s how she would do it.” A friend says: “They will want to be clear and more open, but they’ll do it when they feel ready. I would expect that to be her instinct and it will be her call. They’re not going to be rushed.”
She’s not a show pony!! Says a source: “In Kate’s case, there is almost nobody else in the world whose face, body, clothes are more judged than hers. So it’s entirely right for them not to want to be drawn into a game about what is going on with her health. What is happening is exactly what they said would happen — she would spend two weeks in hospital and be back after Easter. So what if they haven’t pushed her out there to wave from the back of a car? She is not a show pony.”
Social media is being so cruel to them!! Friends say the couple are fully aware of the recent news coverage and some of the more outlandish and lurid conspiracy theories about them on social media. “They’re not like [Prince] Harry, obsessing and scrolling through Twitter, but they know it has broken through. They follow the news and see the BBC breaking news alerts,” says a friend who is in close touch with both. “Social media has provided the media with plenty of content and the speculation around their marriage is just cruel. These are people with three small children going through the hardest time they’ve had to go through as a family, with that as an awful backdrop. They are trying to keep things as normal as possible for the kids, but it’s not easy.”
William’s new private secretary is doing a bang-up job, you guys!!! Helping the couple navigate the current terrain is Ian Patrick, William’s new private secretary, a former diplomat who was appointed MBE for international peacekeeping. He has been in post for less than a fortnight but is already a hit in the household. “Ian is fabulous — thank God he arrived at the perfect moment,” a royal insider says. “He’s fantastic, really calm, super smart. He is perfect for William, and William is really pleased he’s there. He’s been funny, calm and very clear about not reacting to everything.”
The Waleses have a lot of public support: William and Kate have also been “buoyed” by public support and the sense that “the public sentiment is not the same as on TikTok”. On Tuesday, the Buckingham Palace switchboard “rang off the hook” with messages of support for them. After a tumultuous few weeks and months, royal insiders say there will be no big “rethink” over how the couple move forwards. They will simply endeavour to keep calm and carry on, as Queen Elizabeth so often did in the final years of her life when family drama escalated. “I don’t think they should engineer what they do next,” says one who has been in touch with the couple. “The royals are at their best when they get on with their job. Don’t strategise about how to recover ground lost over Photogate, do what you were always intending to do, and when you take the next picture, make sure you take enough so you don’t have to use Photoshop.”
WOW: “But in the history of image-cropping and photo-altering to tell a story, a lot of the reaction from picture agencies was hypocritical.” Kensington Palace hacked together a Frankenphoto and when Reuters, Getty, Associated Press and Agence France-Presse ALL got in touch with KP for clarification and/or an unedited photo, those agencies were ignored, which is what led to the kill order on the photo. KP had ample opportunity to handle this better, to speak with the agencies or simply release the “original” photo. Instead, these dumbf–ks are calling major international agencies “hypocrites” because those agencies wouldn’t publish their amateurish propaganda as proof-of-life.
Also – I’m glad Roya finally solved the mystery of what “after Easter” means. They’ve pushed back Wiglet Christ Superstar’s resurrection until mid-to-late April. After April 17th or thereabouts. Weird that they wouldn’t even confirm Kate’s appearance at Trooping in June then, huh? As for the rest of it… as I said, all of this clearly came from the clowns at KP, including the hilarious aside about William’s brand new private secretary doing such a bang-up job. Huevo has staggered from one fiasco to another since Ian Patrick has been on the job. But hey, at least the new guy makes William and Kate sound like self-pitying, arrogant buffoons in his emails to Roya.
Photos courtesy of Instar, Cover Images, Avalon Red, Kensington Palace.