Tom Brady retired from professional football about three and a half years ago. He retired soon after Gisele Bundchen divorced him for NOT retiring when he said he would. I’ve often wondered if Tom had a completely different idea of what his post-NFL life would look like, with Gisele by his side and their kids growing up. Now he’s one of the most divorced men in the world, and Gisele has remarried and started a new family. Tom has spent the past four years dating random (and much younger) models and influencers and trying to remain culturally relevant. Too harsh? Like, I think Tom IS relevant – he’s rich, he could have pretty much any commentary job he wanted, he has a buffet of beautiful women who would love to marry him and/or use him as a professional stepping stone. So why is Tom so weird these days? I don’t know, but Tom is currently hitting a new low. Right now, Tom is staging a beef with WWE wrestler Logan Paul. Tom “slapped” Logan at an event last week, and he seemingly wants to try his hand at WWE. Well, even Dave Portnoy thinks Tom is pretty lame these days.
Dave Portnoy called out Tom Brady for being “cringey” and “lame” in a scathing “Wake Up Barstool” rant. The Barstool Sports creator told listeners on Monday that “what is happening with Tom Brady post-retirement is one of the great downfalls of an icon.”
He specifically mentioned the ex-NFL player, 48, recently “chopping it up with Logan Paul,” referencing Brady’s staged feud with the WWE wrestler at Michael Rubin’s Fanatics Fest in New York City. Not only did Brady make headlines for slapping the 31-year-old onstage at the Javits Center, but he also gave Paul the bird in a video from the FIFA World Cup Final 2026.
“[This is] a legacy that is being lame-ified,” Portnoy said of the viral moments. “You don’t want to see him mixed up in lowbrow TikTok flag football leagues in Saudi Arabia or whatever it is. Everything about him is cringey right now to me.”
He agreed with Brandon Walker likening Brady to Haliey Welch, the “Hawk Tuah” girl who went viral in 2024. Walker explained, “He has become somebody who looks like he is trying to get to a spotlight, trying to get attention … and Tom Brady shouldn’t have to do things designed for your entertainment.”
Portnoy specifically hit out at Brady’s pal Michael Rubin, alleging that the Fanatics CEO can “lame-ify the coolest guys in the world.”
Noting that the former quarterback is the same “level star” as Michael Jordan, Lionel Messi, Wayne Gretzky and David Beckham, Portnoy insisted Brady “should be above the fray — not Michael Rubin’s puppet.”
Portnoy, similarly, tweeted on Sunday, “Can somebody please shake Tom Brady and tell him to get as far away from Michael Rubin as possible and stop lame-ifying his entire legacy.”
He also wrote that he is “glad” he doesn’t have to “pretend this isn’t lame” since Brady has distanced himself from the New England Patriots, a team Portnoy is a diehard fan of. Brady’s rep did not immediately respond to Page Six’s request for comment.
I’m not any kind of Dave Portnoy fan, but a broken clock, etc. Tom is trying to be “cool” for people who engage with whatever Logan Paul has to offer. Tom is trying to convince people that he’s partying with 20-something influencers. It’s not just “lame,” it’s undignified for a man his age. It reeks of desperation. This is part of a larger conversation about American men and modern celebrity too – many of these guys really need to start asking themselves “what would Harrison Ford/Paul Newman/Robert Redford do?” Would Redford fake a beef with a cheeseball WWE guy? Would Harrison Ford do lame personal appearances just for a drop-in-the-bucket paycheck?
Photos courtesy of Cover Images.
