MINNEAPOLIS — The Bears’ foolishness outlasted Matt Eberflus. It attached itself to interim head coach Thomas Brown like a bad odor in Monday night’s 30-12 loss to the Vikings.
Just when you thought the Bears’ comedy of errors had run out of punchlines came one at U.S. Bank Stadium with all the ingredients of a good sequel: a character the audience had known from previous adventures performing in a new, yet familiar, location.
Remember Doug Kramer, the backup offensive lineman who lined up at fullback against the Commanders, somehow was given a handoff from the 1-yard line and fumbled the ball away? He ran out onto the field in the third quarter Monday night to play fullback with the ball at the same spot — the opposing 1. Quarterback Caleb Williams handed the ball to D’Andre Swift, who ran behind Kramer for a 1-yard touchdown.
Only it wasn’t.
Because he wore an offensive lineman’s number, Kramer was obligated to report as an eligible receiver to the official. He did not. The Bears had their touchdown wiped off the scoreboard and moved backward five yards.
A five-yard run by Swift on the next play gave the Bears the ball at the 1 again. Kramer entered the game again — this time, as an eligible receiver — and Swift lost two yards on a run. Rookie left tackle Kiran Amegadjie, having a brutal day in his first NFL start, was flagged for holding. The Bears moved back 10 yards.
Williams threw incompletions on second-and-goal and third-and-goal from the 11, and the Bears settled for a 29-yard field goal to go down by 10. The Vikings took the ball, drove for 70-yard touchdown drives on their next two possessions and buried the Bears.
This season has already been defined by mistakes that can be explained in shorthand: cornerback Tyrique Stevenson’s Fail Mary, Cardinals running back Emari Demercardo’s “Hail Emari” 53-yard touchdown run, kicker Cairo Santos’ blocked field goal that would have beaten the Packers and Eberflus’ brain freezing up as the clock ran out against the Lions.
The mistakes have been too numerous — across offense, defense and special teams — to be the sole fault of one man. A franchise that preached the value of culture for years sure seems to have found one now: a team most likely to end up on a blooper reel. It’s a wonder the Bears, who haven’t won a game since Oct. 13, are even capable of being embarrassed anymore.
Brown’s debut as the interim coach was never close last week, ending in a 25-point loss to the 49ers that felt like an even bigger blowout. His second act Sunday once again failed at the one thing the team’s offensive play-caller was supposed to be good at. For the third consecutive game, the Bears went into the locker room at halftime without a single point to their name.
Brown entered the game trying to be aggressive against a Vikings team that had lost just two games all year. The Bears didn’t oblige, though — they didn’t convert a third down until about 30 seconds into the fourth quarter. They went for it twice on fourth down, once in their own territory, and failed both times.
Two minutes into the game, Brown decided to hand off on fourth-and-1 at the Bears’ own 39 — and run behind Amegadjie, no less. Swift was stuffed at the line of scrimmage.
Brown went for it again on fourth-and-one with 2:39 to play in the first half. Rather than try for a 47-yard field goal, he again called for a handoff to Sweat. The running back plunged up the middle, and gained nothing.
In the third quarter came his goal line play running behind Kramer. And yet another gaffe in a season full of them.