Serena Williams hosted last night’s ESPYs and… the less said the better. No, I’ll say this – she looked amazing! Great hair, great makeup, great fashion. She changed ensembles several times during the show and most of the looks were great. But she was screwing up those punchlines, wasn’t she? Damn. It’s crazy because Serena is actually really funny in real life. She knows how to tell a joke and she’s hilarious off the cuff. But give her a script with a dozen “set-up + punchline” jokes and she just could not do it. She also cannot sing, but damn, she really tried to turn it into ESPY Karaoke night.
Serena wore this Armani gown for the red carpet and for the opening monologue. Fantastic. She brought her husband Alexis Ohanian and daughter Olympia to the show. She’s still not bringing her baby Adira out, which is fine, but it’s funny to me that Olympia has already been on dozens, if not hundreds, of red carpets and public events.
Alexis was seated just behind the Duke and Duchess of Sussex in the ESPY audience, and I believe that Alexis is quite close with Harry and Meghan, as is Serena, obviously. Serena gave the Sussexes a special shoutout in her opening monologue:
Serena out here telling Prince Harry and Meghan not to breathe too much. You know the accusations are coming #ESPYS24 #ESPYS pic.twitter.com/8VlfTOjuxo
— . (@lettie4u) July 12, 2024
I’m sure that flew over people’s heads in the audience, but Serena was absolutely mocking the British media’s obsession with crying about the Sussexes stealing the Windsors’ nonexistent thunder. My favorite part was when Serena mocked Drake (her ex) and crip-walked to Kendrick Lamar’s “Not Like Us.”
Serena Williams just crip walked at the ESPY Awards to ‘Not Like Us’ making fun of Drake
“and if I’ve learned anything this year, its that none of us should ever pick a fight with Kendrick Lamar… he will make your hometown not like you, the next time Drake sits courtside at a… pic.twitter.com/KAwTdm4uWR
— SOUND (@itsavibe) July 12, 2024
Oh, and Serena, Venus Williams and Quinta Brunson mocked Harrison Butker, that misogynist who plays for the Chiefs.
“So, go ahead and enjoy women’s sports like you would any other sports, because they are sports.” – Venus Williams
“Except you, Harrison Butker. We don’t need you.” – Serena Williams
“At all. Like, ever.” – Quinta Brunson #ESPYS pic.twitter.com/RhvxfiHUWN
— Awful Announcing (@awfulannouncing) July 12, 2024
Photos courtesy of Getty, Backgrid.