One week ago, Daily Mail columnist Liz Jones wrote a scathing piece about Prince William and Kate’s cringefest video, where Kate announced that she is “cancer free” and done with chemotherapy. Jones blasted the “hyper real, perfect, retro” portrayal of Will and Kate, said that Kate “has never seemed more detached” than in this “Hallmark, cringy, cliched” video. She wrote that it was a manipulative piece of misjudgment, done at the wrong time because “the monarchy is hanging by a thread.” Well, I guess Liz Jones got a call. Her latest piece is about the two-year anniversary of QEII’s death, and what Jones thinks QEII would think of all of this. Jones obviously takes several swipes at the Sussexes, and she’s backed down from blasting Kate and William. Some highlights:
The “distractions” at QEII’s funeral: There were distractions, too. The fact that Harry was not allowed to wear a uniform, despite his tours of active service. Meghan’s tears, wiped away by a black glove. Her black Stella McCartney cape dress.
Kate at the funeral: And, of course, Kate, who was dressed immaculately in a razor-sharp Alexander McQueen coat dress, looking solemn yet striking in a Philip Treacy hat and veil and ropes of creamy pearls. Appearing to pretend Meghan did not even exist, she kept a watchful eye on her children and Prince William. Kate knew the day was not about her.
When did Charles’s reign fall apart? And then… the Dutch version of a book by Omid Scobie named two so-called ‘royal racists’. The Princess of Wales was forced to apologise for confusion over edits to a ‘manipulated’ Mother’s Day picture. And, of course, Charles and Kate announced their cancer diagnoses within months of one another. Suddenly, the Royal Family seemed depleted, rudderless. Wild speculation about Catherine’s absence from public life earlier this year, before she revealed she had cancer, swirled online, and the Queen’s mantra of ‘never complain, never explain’ seemed as outdated and restricting as a corset.
What QEII would have said about the Harry issue: Then there is the Harry issue. I think the Queen would have counselled Charles to allow Harry more time when he flew to Buckingham Palace upon news of his father’s illness in February this year. She would have told her son that it was not a good look to be so ungenerous. And I believe she would firmly tell William to tread softly with Harry, too.
What QEII would have said about Andrew: I imagine Charles’s most recent hardening against his younger brother, Prince Andrew – wanting him to downsize from the Grade II-listed Royal Lodge in Windsor Great Park to the empty Frogmore Cottage – would also furrow her brow: the Queen, after all, made sure Andrew accompanied her to Prince Philip’s memorial, a rare act of placing family before duty.
What would QEII have said about the Labour government: The Queen would be dismayed, perhaps, that her generation, the one that built this country, is seemingly being unfairly punished by a new Labour government, though she would, of course, have kept any political opinions to herself. That’s what I miss most: her ability to keep quiet when there is so much unsolicited, ill-informed noise.
QEII would have been proud of Will & Kate though: But how proud she would be of William and Kate, watching their moving video announcing the Princess’s completion of chemotherapy. She would doubtless have rolled her eyes at the soft-focus, surely made in response to the tyranny of intimacy we all demand these days. But she would have seen herself in Kate – her uncomplaining, straight-backed, stoic lack of self-pity. And I am convinced the late Queen would be comforted that the family, currently so fractured, is in very safe hands.
It feels like a blackmail situation, to get a Mail columnist to reverse course so quickly and pretend that she wasn’t one of the loudest critics of Kate’s cringefest video last week. I also think it’s sort of stupidly hilarious to go on and on about “what QEII would have thought about this or that,” like she didn’t make her feelings perfectly clear when she was alive. She clearly wanted the Sussexes to have Frogmore Cottage. She clearly wanted the Sussexes to still be welcome at family events and probably even state events. She clearly wanted the Sussexes to have security in the UK. She also wanted Charles to be a better father to both of his sons. Unfortunately, Camilla has been pulling the strings for years and what Camilla wants, Camilla gets. It’s funny how Camilla gets no mention here – probably because even royalist fantasists can’t lie that blatantly – “oh, QEII would have loved to see Camilla staggering around in all of her old jewelry!” Please.
(Incidentally, the biggest lie of all in this piece is that Kate is somehow demure and mindful at funerals – Kate turned both QEII and Prince Philip’s funerals into her own little Solemn & Keen extravaganzas.)
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.