Opinion: Visiting a nursing home for the holidays? Here’s how to tell if your parents are safe.

During college, the median age of my friends was about 88. I hung out with them nights and weekends for three years.

Sure, I got paid a whopping $4.25 an hour and worked a physically demanding job, but I survived by enjoying the connections I made with the residents and staff of the elder-care facility where I worked.

Some 20 years later, when my mother moved in with me, she told me, “When the time comes, I want you to put me in a nursing home.”

“Never,” was my response. I knew that even in the best facilities, things can go wrong.

Not everyone has the luxury to stay home with family, so what can we do to get our loved ones the best care possible? When friends would ask me, based on my own experiences, I always said to look for non-profit facilities, perhaps one run by an organization like a church, with community involvement and a volunteer group.

This holiday season, I am thinking of our seniors living in long-term care. Here’s how we can all help.

A scary time for my mom

When my mother went to a temporary rehab center after her second hip replacement, I visited her daily, sometimes twice a day, and quickly realized I had to get her out of there. She couldn’t remember where she was, or why she was there. She was getting no therapy, nor much care other than some medicine that she wasn’t on previously. They told me she had dementia. They showed me a test she failed when she couldn’t draw a clock (Salvador Dali would have been proud).

They said she would need continued care and likely wouldn’t return home.

Prior to her surgery, she was fine, with a sound mind. But she struggled to fully wake up from the anesthesia, so they couldn’t start her physical rehab right away. The hospital arranged to send her to a rehab center. I didn’t think to check them out first. I guess I thought the hospital would know if it was a good facility. It wasn’t.

After a week, I walked into the administration offices and asked to see her chart. They were giving her medicines that weren’t part of her regular regimen. I told them I was taking her home.

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They hadn’t changed her bedding, helped her bathe, or done any physical therapy since she had been checked in. It made me appreciate even more the nonprofit place I had worked at in college, and our fabulous volunteers, rigorous attention to the residents, and the work ethic of my colleagues.

“You think you can take care of her better than we can?” the nursing administrator asked me.

“I can. And I have,” I responded.

I shared more pointed words with her before taking Mom home. That evening, she started reconnecting with the world, and by the next day, we were starting physical rehab at home.

“What happened?” she asked. She remembered little of that stay, thankfully. Her mind was as sharp as ever, though I never made her draw a clock. I’m guessing that test doesn’t work well when you are heavily drugged.

When I relayed this story to Tamika Atkins, administrator of the nonprofit Health Care Center at Franklin Park in Denver, she said some facilities use drugs as restraints. It’s called “snowing.”

“Can you imagine the people or the residents that don’t have any family that come to visit?” she said.

Profit margins vs. a caring approach

Recently, we ran a commentary from The Conversation about how some for-profit companies “are cutting corners on safety and draining resources.” It made me think about the reaches of capitalism. I’m not anti-capitalist. But there are some thresholds that investor profits should not darken. Profit at nursing facilities should not take away from the very needs they purport to serve. There should be limits to profiting off the detriment of others.

“There’s definitely a difference in care and how they are run,” said Atkins, who has worked at both types of facilities. “I like working for a non-profit way better than a for-profit. Because a for-profit wanted us to get anybody in the building … get the beds filled.”

Nonprofits may need to rely on outside resources to improve the quality of life for people in their care. Vanessa Novencidoa, who directs special projects and the volunteer program at Franklin Park, raises funds to provide activities and holiday gifts for its residents. She mentioned that many of the residents don’t have family that can provide gifts or visit them. Some of the residents they take care of at the facility near Colfax and Park Avenue came to them from the streets. They have a partnership with the V.A. to serve our veterans and many residents are from humble means.

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“We literally are trying to build this relationship and community bond with Denver and the metro area to enrich our residents’ lives,” Novencidoa said. “Because we are a nonprofit, our goal is to bring in as much as we can for them.”

When I visited, I met with cheery staff working hard in the heart of Denver. They could use a hand to take care of people who haven’t had a lot of breaks in life.

The answers: Research and advocacy

If you are trying to find a place for a loved one, make sure the facility is the right fit. As Atkins told me, you need to consider the demographics of the resident. “Consider people’s walks of life and where they come from.” Some people will want the bigger, ritzier nursing homes.”

The Franklin Park facility, originally built in 1895, later became Lamb Memorial Hospital. Though the building has been updated, it may not meet a ritzy standard, but she said they strive to be “the Marriott of care.”

“For some people, it’s the best they’ve ever had. They might have been homeless for the last 10 years, they come in here and now they got clean bathrooms, they’re sleeping in a nice, safe environment,” Atkins said. And they have people caring for them around the clock.

Make sure to tour potential facilities. Do they provide the type of care your loved one needs? Ask questions about the current residents’ happiness, activities and daily lives. Research the ownership of the facilities. Is the company in the business for profit or for care? For-profit facilities can be quite luxurious and cater to private pay. If you can afford it, you can find nice ones that have high-end care and amenities.

View reports on Colorado nursing homes through the state health department. And once you are in a facility, you will have access to a state-appointed ombudsman who helps advocate for residents and families. You can ask the facility staff for the name and contact information, and it is posted publicly. An initiative of President Richard Nixon established in the 1970s, state ombudsman programs were rolled out to improve the lives of nursing home residents nationwide.

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“We are at the bedsides of residents every day,” said Leah McMahon, Colorado state long-term care ombudsman, “asking them ‘How is it going? Are you satisfied with the quality of life and care you are getting here?’ ”

Ombudsmen are the voices of the residents and their family members. They investigate complaints.

“Our first goal is always to empower residents with information,” McMahon, director of the state program, said. “We advocate with their permission or if they can’t for themselves.”

I worked with incredibly caring people at a non-profit facility with a lot of volunteers. Yet, day-to-day the level of care could fail based on staffing. There were too many factors out of my control. But the best thing you can do for your loved one is stay in touch. Make sure that the facility recognizes your face when you walk in, even if your father or mother doesn’t. Know what their day-to-day life is like, be there to help care for them and remain a part of their lives.

Coloradans in nursing homes are among the most vulnerable populations, with their quality of life determined by others. Protecting them takes vigilance.

Visit communityatfranklinpark.net to learn more about the historic facility and to donate time or money.

Visit cdphe.colorado.gov/health-facilities/find-and-compare-facilities to compare potential resident care centers.

Visit coombudsman.org to connect with an ombudsman via the Colorado Department of Human Services.

TJ Hutchinson is a member of The Denver Post editorial board.

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