Saturday Night Five: Big 12 insanity, Arizona’s breakthrough, Colorado on the brink, Jeanty delivers and UCLA’s brutal reality

Instant reaction to Week 5 developments …

1. Conference of chaos

The Big 12 isn’t just drunk, folks. It’s a slobbering, stinking, stammering old man staggering down the sidewalk in broad daylight. And it’s absolutely glorious.

We knew the conference would ooze parity and unpredictability well before the first snap of its 16-team existence, but September has been ridiculous.

Up is down, down is up and logic has exited the stage (just like Oklahoma State’s offense).

The latest example came courtesy of the final game of Week 5 when Arizona, which was last seen getting run off the field by Kansas State, went to Rice-Eccles Stadium and thumped Utah, which was last seen dominating Oklahoma State.

The Utes, picked to win the Big 12 in the preseason media poll, are looking up in the standings — at their bitter enemy.

Brigham Young, picked 13th in that very same media poll, is currently 5-0 and tied for first place with Colorado, which was picked 11th, and Texas Tech, which was picked ninth. All three teams are 2-0 in conference play.

At the bottom of the standings we find the Cowboys, who were picked third, and Kansas, which was pegged for fourth.

Try making sense of Kansas State, which whacked Arizona, got blown out by BYU, then handled Oklahoma State over three consecutive weekends.

Try explaining how a team (Texas Tech) which needed overtime to beat Abilene Christian could be tied atop the standings.

Or how a team (TCU) that lost at SMU by 24 points could turn around and win at Kansas by 11.

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Granted, not every aspect of the conference has been unpredictable:

— Utah quarterback Cam Rising is hurt again.

— Baylor coach Dave Aranda is on the hot seat.

— Colorado cornerback/receiver Travis Hunter is otherworldly.

— Iowa State is undefeated.

— Houston is dreadful.

But that’s where the logic ends.

Is two more months of this insanity too much to ask for?

2. That’s more like it

We mentioned Arizona’s victory in the opening section, but it’s worthy of additional context.

Yes, the Utes were without Rising once again, and that cannot be ignored.

But the same team, with freshman Isaac Wilson at quarterback, drilled Oklahoma State a week ago in blazing Stillwater. So while Rising’s absence should be considered, it hardly explains everything about Arizona’s 23-10 victory.

This was the first complete game of the Wildcats’ season — the type of performance we saw from them late last year and the type of performance we expected to see, early and often, this year.

The defense stood tall on the line of scrimmage and made plays in the secondary.

Quarterback Noah Fifita was masterful, especially under pressure, and receiver Tetairoa McMillan had plenty of help in the aerial game.

All in all, it was exactly the all-around performance first-year coach Brent Brennan needed from his team after the lackluster showing at Kansas State two weeks ago.

And because the trip to Manhattan was not a conference game, the Wildcats are undefeated in Big 12 play and well positioned to navigate the mayhem.

3. Brilliance on blue turf

Washington State’s duel with Boise State wasn’t listed among the marquee matchups of Week 5 but carried significant postseason stakes.

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The Cougars needed a victory to maintain their faint hopes for an at-large berth into the College Football Playoff while the Broncos are contending for the automatic bid that goes to the highest-ranked team from the Group of Five.

But the showdown quickly turned into the Ashton Jeanty show.

Boise State’s sensational tailback ripped off a 64-yard touchdown run in the opening minutes and went on to rush for 259 yards (plus four touchdowns) in the Broncos’ 45-24 victory.

He’s now averaging 211.3 yards per game and 10.3 yards per carry.

Jeanty deserves a spot in New York City for the Heisman Trophy ceremony.

4. Bowling in Boulder

The most complete performance of the Deion Sanders era pushed Colorado within two victories of a bowl berth.

In fact, we’ll call it here and now: Combine improvement on lines of scrimmage with unexpected weakness in their schedule, and the Buffaloes are a lock for the postseason.

At 4-1 overall, they possess significant margin for error entering October and several flawed opponents upcoming.

Kansas State is 4-1 but has not played well on the road, and the Oct. 12 matchup is in Boulder.

Cincinnati is without a quality win and lost to the only solid opponent on its September schedule (Pittsburgh).

Colorado’s final month begins with a visit to Texas Tech — another winnable game — and the final two opponents, Kansas and Oklahoma State, are struggling.

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Put another way, CU merely needs a 2-5 record to qualify for the postseason and has a barrage of winnable games remaining.

5. Abject brutality

Let’s have a moment of silence for UCLA’s 2024 football season. May it rest in peace.

If you haven’t been paying attention, the Bruins opened with a narrow victory over a bad team, Hawaii, then got run out of the Rose Bowl by a good team, Indiana.

Fortunately, the schedule lightened up at that point and the Bruins headed to Death Valley to face LSU, where they were overpowered in the second half of a 17-point loss.

The soft stretch continued Saturday when Oregon paid a visit and, with two weeks to prepare, blasted to a 25-point lead in the first half before coasting to victory.

And next week comes the easiest assignment of all for UCLA, which flies across the country to face Penn State in the Fox ‘Big Noon’ window.

Yep, after all that, the Bruins (1-3) are now tasked with playing in the middle of Pennsylvania at 9 a.m. Pacific.

Welcome to the Big Ten.

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